Old Records

2008-12-10T15:43:00.001-05:00

Yep, it's over.

And I'm okay with that. Really really. It's strange, actually. I felt it coming, and I'd already had some thoughts earlier, and now it's over and I feel... fine.

2008-11-29T12:15:00.003-05:00

"Wouldn't it be great if no one ever got offended!
Wouldn't it be great to say what's really on your mind"...

I'm confused. Uncertain. Perplexed. And just a little but hurt. I'm not sure what's going on, but past events give me very little patience with the current situation. But what if I'm reading it all wrong? Am I really being 'cut out', or is there just a lack of opportunity to communicate? Do I give it more time, or should I just move on? What's better: the benefit of the doubt or self-preservation?

2008-11-17T20:59:00.002-05:00

Slavery, squares, serials, snow, and stickhandling.

15 days.
31 students.
90 minutes from home.
Infinite number of lesson plans.

Hooray for practicum!

More later.... I've got tests to mark, and I'm procrastinating. But I promised.

2008-03-04T12:54:00.003-05:00

I CAN HAS GOLDFISH??????

Yes, yes, it's snacktime. And I have Goldfish. Gowdfish. Plain goldfish - none of those froofy flavourings for me, thank you very much. Though I know how much Andrew liked them.

www.icanhascheezburger.com - That is one hilarious website!

Ooh, that's a fat one!

Today's just been dragging along - I can't believe it's only 1:00! Alarm clock went off at 6:30, got up at 7:06, had a quick shower, woke Jon up to ask him to drive me to school, dried and straightened hair, woke Jon up, got the rest of myself ready, woke Jon up, warmed up some milk for my coffee, realized that someone STOLE my travel mug, chugged down the coffee, went to school, la la sat through 8:30 class, probably dozed off, went to the Student's Centre for an English Toffee, saw the hugely long line at TH (it's Roll-up-the-Rim time, and I'm 0 for 4), walked around for a bit, chatted with Dee for about half an hour, got the ET, got a computer, have been sitting here ever since, reading all kinds of stuff online and working on a vest (this thing's taking forever! Take 2 on this thing - I went from 220 stitches on a 4mm needle to 190 on a 4.5 mm; it's made quite a difference, but it's still taking a long time. I tore apart an old sweater of Jo's that didn't fit either of us, so it's all free yarn for me! and tons of it! It's an interesting gray that'll work well over just about all of my dress shirts, so that's good. If it fits. What if it doesn't? Eugh, that's a horrible thought!)

Want ridiculous? How about the Capitals/Bruins game last night? 6-0 for Washington after the first period? 10-2 final score?

Now that's

Ridiculous.

Or do you want a good book? Try The Black Tulip, by Alexandre Dumas. A fascinating story of political and personal betrayal, amid the race to develop the rarest of the most-prized flower, the tulip. Wonderfully written, if a bit shaky on historical accuracy, and it's set in Holland, which is just one more reason to read it!

2008-02-15T14:55:00.003-05:00

"It's a marshmallow world in the winter
When the snow comes to cover the ground.
It's time for play,
It's a whipped-cream day
I wait for it the whole year round."

Yes, I know that's supposed to be a Christmas song, but seriously, look outside! (and there's more on the way). And that song got itself stuck in my head - I caught myself singing it in the shower last night!

This week has been pretty close to fantastic, I think. Well, now it's okay, anyway. I recall thinking yesterday that the week was entirely too short, where was I going to find enough time to study for 2 midterms AND write a 7-page annotated bibliography? Guess what - that's all done now, and not enough bad enough to lose sleep over! And now my last class of the week is finished, and it's time for the Reading Week excitement to begin! Actually, I got a head start on that already on Wednesday. Because on Wednesday, exactly 5 years minus 1 day from the day I wrote my G1 driver's test, I (finally) got my G! I really cut it close on that one. Ahhh, the thrill of procrastination. I was, yes, a bit nervous, but not too bad - I knew that I knew what I was doing...... mostly. Then last night I got a call from my Campfire! co-counsellor from last summer, who's coming over on Sunday! We started getting excited about seeing each other again - maybe not the best timing, because after that I had to force myself to sit down and finish my bibliography. Bleaugh.

Today - after I had handed in the bibliography, and Dr. G. totally scooped all my material for my seminar presentation (!) - I took the bus downtown again (I do that at least twice a week, I think!) to the library, hoping to get some video entertainment for next week. I didn't get the movies - either of them :( - but I managed to find some books to console myself ;), and I saw Janelle, whom I haven't seen since Christmas. The books should last me - til Monday, anyway.

But now I have coffee (serious caffeine addiction going on here, I tell ya), and I know I have no more academic requirements for at least the next half week, and I'm going to see Mel and Laura on Sunday, and Debbie on Wednesday if we can work it out, and my other girls on Friday - and this is gonna be great!

Have a good Reading Week - or just Family Day (*hah!*) if you're not lucky enough to be a student (or if you go to York U. - hee hee!)

2007-10-10T11:06:00.000-04:00

Bo: "You forgot something very important."
Riccio: "What?"
Bo: "It's under my jumper."
Hornet: "What?"
Bo: [pulls up his sweater] "Me!"

~ my favourite quote from the movie The Thief Lord

... except when Bo says it, it's more like "Mmmeeeeee!!!!"

I'm a little twitchy today. I think it's a combination of early-morning coffee and a postponed presentation I was gearing up for. You know the feeling: you know the professor is going to introduce your topic (Roman temples, in this case), and you're waiting for her to start on the temple of Apollo on the Palatine, which was your topic, and instead she's talking about the temple of Jupiter Capitolinus, and before you can present class is over. So all those nervous butterflies don't get to come out, and they sit and twitch for the next hour, making it really hard to type in passwords or anything, because they reach all the way to your fingers. That's me at the moment. "Mmmeeeeee!!!!"

Hm, hm, hm. It's a little slow right now - four hours to wait until my next class, but then everything will start up again. Right after class I have to run to catch the bus and go to work, which will probably be really busy because Monday was a holiday.

2007-10-01T13:30:00.000-04:00

Random Thoughts.......

(alert: these are really random!)

* I love the way babies smell after they have a bath. I was babysitting yesterday at church, and trying to get the youngest baby to sleep - my arm and shoulder were so sore afterwards, but I wouldn't have traded that for anything.

* I can't wait to start my new job - I get to take the bus for the first time by myself, and finally make use of this HSR sticker on my student card that I've had for 4 years! Plus the job should be great - I already know how to do it.

* I want coffee. Okay, that wasn't really so random as much as it is constant - I can't get going in the morning without my dose of motor oil!

* I'm using these "-" thingies a lot!

* I want to go to Holland. I really want to go!

* I really liked making Em's birthday present. I'm actually looking for ways to prolong it!

* Then I have to make Jon a scarf

* ... and a birthday present, I think

* It's a good thing I know how to knit - I probably won't have much money to buy presents!

* It feels weird when Jo comes to visit, because I know it isn't really her home anymore, but it was for so many years!

* Still 20 minutes to go. I think I'm going to go get lunch - a hot dog, maybe.

* There's a HOLE in the bottom of my jacket pocket!

* Will it feel weird if I knit on the bus?

* If the temperature in here is a reflection of outside, I'm going to regret not taking my fingerless gloves with me today!

* Is it possible to live without regrets?

* Is anyone but me going to read this post?

* Maybe I'll get a muffin and E.T. instead

I'd apologize again for the random-ness, but I doubt anyone but me will read this post, and I know what I'm like.

2007-09-21T16:35:00.000-04:00

"But blessings can hide in the strangest disguise"

So it's late Friday afternoon, the second floor is nearing desertion, everyone's heading home for the weekend, and what am I doing? Killing time online by writing on my blog, naturally. My ride won't be here for another half hour -ish, classes are finished for me for the week, and I'm stuck here in limbo. Okay.

I really like fall. It's the time when you can think about warm sweaters and scarves and mittens, but it's not seriously cold. Most of my favourite clothes are for these in-between seasons, and the air is fresher. You're holding on to the last days of summer, relishing the break from humidity. So many things begin in the fall; it makes me thing of the poem "Happy New Year, Anyway." September is the time for beginnings: it feels like a new year. New friends, new classes, new books, new ideas. I like it.

And this entry's title comes once again from a Great Big Sea song.... whenever someone says "lucky you" or "lucky me", it puts this song in my head. Today it happened several times, so...

"As long as the river still runs to the sea, hey lucky you, lucky me"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(added Sept. 27)

And now I have another new job... or at least a new variation on a current job. Starting next Monday, I'll be working at Ancaster Library until the end of December. It's funny how things can just pop up out of nowhere! Woot!

2007-09-11T10:57:00.000-04:00

And that's done!

Wow, what a summer! Lots of warm / hot days, a fantastic job, and what an ending!

I guess it all started back in January, when I submitted a resume to the local archives in case my then-current job possibility didn't pan out. It didn't, by the way. Fast forward to mid-May, when I got a phone call from Mrs. W., asking if I was still interested in working at the Archives. I said yes, and we set up an interview. That Friday we discussed the job and my qualifications, and right there and then I got the job! I started the next Monday by sitting in on a grade 10 History class at the local high school, taking notes on the discussion about local veterans. Over the next three months I researched so much local history. I'm like a walking encyclopedia! That was my best summer job ever! I just wish I could find out where that missing house is! (There's a story behind that. There are a lot of stories I could tell). Due to the requirements of the job I couldn't go camping with the family (:( ), but I did go to Campfire! this year, and had a wonderful time! I made new friends and reconnected with people I'd met before, and had a great group of campers - the oldest group of girls, which was something I hadn't experienced in a while, not since my CIT year. Wonderful girls. My co-counsellor and I got along so well, and the four counsellors in our cabin had so much fun together! Peanuts, Star, and Soleil, I'll always remember the talks that lasted far too long to get a decent night's sleep, and the hilarious time we had lying out on the lawn the last night. Hopefully I'll also remember what that does to my back!

The night Ben and I got back from camp was also the night Andre and Linda came. It was surprising, how quickly we picked up where we left off 8 years ago. We went camping at Craigleith ( I really like that area!), spent a day at Canada's Wonderland where I finally rode the Italian Job ride and did the Vortex twice and got Ben soaked on the raft ride *semi-evil grin*. We went to Niagara Falls and saw the lights on the falls at night (and also went out for supper - very good food), we went to an Indian village - I never knew there was one so close by! - and all kinds of tourist-y things. Linda and I also watched about 10 cheesy chick-flicks over the three weeks they were here, tormenting the boys with show tunes, especially High School Musical! The funny thing was, they were the ones who quoted from it numerous times this weekend!

Yes, this past weekend. This weekend my sister got married, to the best brother-in-law I have. :P We had to get up early on Saturday morning to get our hair done, which wasn't so easy since all of us except the bride had gone out bowling the night before. Before we were finished or even properly dressed, the photographer came to get the pre-wedding pictures. Oh, the look on Linda's face when he came downstairs, and she was still in her pajamas! (Well Lyn, almost all of us were). From there it was off to the church, and the beautiful ceremony where my beautiful, glowing sister married the prins van her dromen! All us bridesmaids cried at some point, especially when Jo's voice cracked as she recited her vows. But we weren't alone. According to the best man's wife, about half the church was sniffling then. The rest of the afternoon and evening we celebrated with the families, laughed so often at the stories people told about Jo and Chris, and finally waved them off to their new home. Now they're on their honeymoon, Andre and Linda have gone home, and the house will be so quiet. It's like I had to say goodbye to two sisters in one weeked. Now it's just me and the boys. I miss you all.

2007-04-02T09:40:00.000-04:00

"everybody's talking' 'bout the new sound - funny, but it's still rock and roll to me."

Mmmmm, life's been good lately. Nothing spectacular-ish (note the lack of blogging), but overall good. I'm 0 for twenty-something in roll up the rim (and I told Brian he could have anything I win that's worth less than $1000, except the free coffee :) ), my room is an absolute mess again (I've got to clean it before J and J come over Friday night), and school's almost over for the summer. My third year, nearly finished. That took forever in high school; why's it going so fast now? (Oh wait, shorter semesters. That'll do it. :P) One more year of university. Wow.

As far as other, um, achievements go, on Saturday I managed to spend..... nearly $300, I think. Most of it wasn't mine, and wasn't for me alone. Jenica, I bought you a birthday present. I'm not sure when you'll get it, but I got it. I also managed to avoid buying any yarn - amazing? Yes. I'm trying to finish things off before rushing into something new, and it's starting to pay off! Saturday night after the Leafs game (I stayed awake through the whole thing, thanks to my recent, um, development of a coffee addiction) I pulled out a duvet cover I started making waaaaay back in my first year of university. Two hours and five seams later, I was done. Well, almost done; there's a little refining hand-sewing left to do, but the thing is functional! I put the new comforter I've been saving for two years inside the cover, and threw it on my bed. I luv it. It's thick but light but warm, and the pattern is funky. *happy hum* So now I think I can justify starting something new for myself, right? And I've already found it. It's another sweater, and I know I shouldn't be thinking about sweaters this time of year, but I am. The pattern is for a guy's sweater, but it looks really good and has basically no shaping required. 'Sides, I can always use an extra sweater - the basement is still pretty cold at night. And I need something to work on tonight while we're watching Anne of Green Gables with some girls from C&C. I am going to get so much of Anne in the next few weeks, what with the movie night and Ben being part of Guido's production and all that. It brings back good memories of a certain birthday party, where we shrieked every time a bomb fell. [happy]

You know what else is making me laugh right now? Watching my attempts to type "google''. So far the most memorable one I've tried has been 'goofle'. I'm a goofle. A goofle who finally found the *perfect* recipe for brownies, and made them on Friday. Nothing better than having a house that smells like fresh-baked brownies all to oneself..... except the fact that one has the brownies all to oneself, too - at least 'til 4:00. "Mmm-mmmm, yummy good!"

And now it's 10:13, time for coffee. he-heeee!

2007-02-28T11:20:00.000-05:00

Today has been a special day,
An anniversary, a request
That you play your piano
As the evening sun slowly sets.
I never thought I'd get this old, dear,
Never had a reason to live so long.
And the Lord's been like my shadow,
Even when I was wrong.
No, I never thought it would turn out this way.

The birthday with apologies
For all the tears and regrets,
And I've always saved your poetry
For these years when you forget.
I never thought I'd get this old, dear,
Never had a reason to live so long.
And the Lord's been like my shadow
Even when I was wrong
No I never thought it would turn out this way.

So sing with me softly,
As the day turns to night,
And later I'll dream
Of paradise with you.
I love you,
And goodnight.

~ Eva Cassidy, "Anniversary Song".

2007-01-31T16:35:00.000-05:00

So, I told Em today and I know I've said it here before, I love Burton Cummings. The music, not the man. He's too old for me :). His voice is great, and his songs are just what I need to make my day a fantastic day - a "doog" day, if you will. What is it about the music? There's such a range of emotions, from crazy happy to lonely to pensive to sad. And that's all part of life. But if I had to choose one song for my personal theme song, it would have to be "My Own Way to Rock". That's the way I am. People tell me I'm weird or crazy on a regular basis, though I think that means I just don't always act the way they think I will. Catching people off guard is part of the fun of life! Who cares what they think? For me, being crazy = getting as much enjoyment as possible out of the moment. That said, I can be serious when need be. But it's so much better when you look at the world with a smile on your face! And there's the song that starts off:

"Hey, good-lookin' why the frown? You always look better when it's up-side-down"

Hearing that song always makes me smile, and that can make even the worst of days just a little bit brighter. So go ahead, smile when everything's going insane; if nothing else, you'll get a kick out of other peoples' reactions when they declare you crazy. Be unconventional.

I'm gonna take my silver dollar
Change it into quarters
Shove 'em in the record machine'

Cause I got my own way to rock
I got my own way to roll
And when you're walkin that walk
It's good for your soul

2007-01-25T09:15:00.000-05:00

Sometimes a song just says it all.

I've got a smile on my face, and I've got four walls around me
I've got the sun in the sky, all the water surrounds me
Yeah, I'll win now but sometimes I'll lose
I've been battered, but I'll never bruise,
It's not so bad

[Chorus]
And I say way-hey-hey, it's just an ordinary day
And it's all your state of mind
At the end of the day, you've just got to say, it's all right.

Janey sings on the corner, what keeps her from dying?
Let them say what they want, she won't stop trying
She might stumble, if they push her 'round
She might fall, but she'll never lie down
It's not so bad

And I say way-hey-hey, it's just an ordinary day
And it's all your state of mind
At the end of the day, you've just got to say, it's all right.

In this beautiful life, there's always some sorrow
It's a double edged knife, but there's always tomorrow
It's up to you now if you sink or swim,
Just keep the faith and your ship will come in.
It's not so bad

And I say way-hey-hey, it's just an ordinary day
And it's all your state of mind
At the end of the day, you've just got to say, it's all right.

~ Ordinary Day, by Great Big Sea.

Today's a good day, even if it is Thursday. Yesterday was good, too: I finally got a chance to go online and chat with my friends, West beat East 11-8 in the all-star game (though I was kinda cheering for the East). And tomorrow's Friday already. Em, I made the week go fast! I'm actually getting really nervous about tomorrow. I'm not sure if I want that phone call, or if I'd rather just go on thinking about it for another week. I've been off and on all week about this, and it's starting to annoy me. One minute I feel confident that it will go the way I hoped, the next I'm sure it won't. And what if they don't call on Friday? What if they call Saturday while I'm at work? Okay, I've got to calm down. I think I'll treat myself today and get an English toffee. I've cut back on those, so now it's a once-in-a-long-while treat. And then I'll go home and finish knitting my socks (really cool pattern) or the little vest which looks so cute.

Hey, guess what? I distracted myself and now I'm calm. I think I'm going to go read other blogs now, and distract myself even more. *happy sigh*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And the guy just across from me is listening to GBS loud enough for me to hear - a good substitute for my CD player, which is on the fritz right now. How great is that?

2006-12-01T15:38:00.000-05:00

FRIENDSHIPS

Often, I look out the window and wait. I see her as she comes and goes, to visit with everyone-it seems but me. I know that sometimes I'm not as friendly as I should be. But I'm scared- that people won't like me. So I hide in my shell. And talk to no one. But still... I wish they would notice that I am here. I need them. Please, somebody talk to me. I need a friend.

You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.

If two friends ask you to judge a dispute, don't accept, because you will lose one friend; on the other hand, if two strangers come with the same request, accept because you will gain one friend. ~ Augustine (354-430)

It takes two people to ruin a perfectly good day. First a person who says something downright nasty about you, and second, a dear friend who makes sure you hear about it immediately.

A man's friendships are one of the best measures of his worth.

One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives.
~ Euripides (BC 480-BC 406)

But friendship is precious, not only in the shade, but in the sunshine of life; and thanks to a benevolent arrangement of things, the greater part of life is sunshine.
~ Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826)

Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art. It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival.
~ C. S. Lewis (1898-1963)

No man is useless while he has a friend.
~ Robert Louis Stevenson(1850-1895)

It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them.
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson(1803-1882)

Only your real friends tell you when your face is dirty.
~ Sicilian Proverb

And the joy of it all; when we count it all up; is found in the making of friends.

2006-11-22T14:25:00.000-05:00

I need a happy song for when I'm done my essays..... I think I'm gonna play Footloose, really loud. That's a happy song.

(Patrick gave me the idea for a happy dance; thanks, man.)

2006-11-16T12:18:00.000-05:00

I hate being sick.

I have a beautiful cold now, and it only got worse with all the rain outside and a ten-minute walk to the library. Plus, I didn't sleep well at all last night. Strangely enough, that wasn't because of the movie I watched right before bed (Alfred Hitchcock's The Man Who Knew Too Much), but more likely because I couldn't breathe properly. Stubid cowld.
~ I now know why all your words sound funny when you have a cold. It all has to do with... it's linguistics ~

On the bright side, I'm getting to the writing part of my essay, which is going all right. Already a page and a half done! Ivory is actually kinda fascinating!

2006-11-06T13:58:00.000-05:00

CYA!

What a great weekend! Well worth all the hyper-ness beforehand, right Em? We both came well-prepared with extra blankets (something like 3 each), since we had been warned about the cold and likelihood of snow. I borrowed the mapbook from Chris again, though Emily knows "the" way :), we ate a bit of supper with the family, filled up with gas, and then "with only fear and good judgement holding us back" (I've waited so long to use that line!), we set out on the road. A little snow here and there made for interesting driving, but we made it alright - a little late, maybe, but still... The festivities were still going on by the time we got there :), and no one had a set bedtime, so imagine what that meant for Saturday.......

~ turns out we didn't even need 3 extra blankets because we used the space heater; I ended up sleeping on top of two of mine ("ferpectly" alright)

Saturday was really great: fantastic speeches, good discussions, AMAZING food, and I met a whole ton of people!

I'm definitely going to the next one!

(Em, you forgot your book!)

Here, this is really funny: http://undoubtablyme.blogspot.com/2006/11/do-not-read-this-at-office.html

2006-11-02T13:22:00.000-05:00

"Well, winter is a-comin' and a chill is in the breeze,
My pirate days are over once the river starts to freeze!
I'll be back in springtime, but now I've got to go:
I hear there's lots of plundering down in New Mexicoooooooo......"

:D

(Em, b.t.w., you don't happen to own a copy of Semi-Conducted, do you? It's been a while since I heard the whole thing.)

2006-10-30T14:02:00.000-05:00

Go And Sin No More

I’ve sinned come on my knees
For I’m not worthy of Your love
How could You die for me?
Such grace can only come from God
Oh Lord, You search and You know me
You see me inside out
God You alone can forgive me
Erase my fear and my doubt
Father You pick me up
I feel like a child in Your arms
I don’t deserve this love but
I hear Your voice Lord Jesus

(Chorus):
Go and sin no more
He said "I will not condemn you,
I’ll forgive and I’ll forget it all.
Go and sin no more.
My child let me remind you
It is I who’ll lead and guide you as you go"

You are my purpose
You are the reason that I live
I want to be like You
Help me to love and to forgive
God let me not be distracted
Lord help me focus on You
Keep sin from ruling my life, Lord
Make me holy and pure
Father You pick me up
I feel like a child in Your arms
I don’t deserve this love but
I hear Your voice Lord Jesus

(Chorus)

Wipe, wipe away
Take, take away
Break, break away
Fill my life, make it right
Father help me, Father help me go

(Chorus)

He said, "I will not condemn you, no
Go and sin no more.
My child let me remind you
It is I who’ll lead and guide you as you go"

I’ve sinned come on my knees
How could You die for me
Search my heart
Know my thoughts
See me inside out and all throughout me
You alone can forgive me
You always pick me up
Like a child
In Your arms
I could stay with you forever here

~ Rebecca St. James

2006-10-25T19:59:00.000-04:00

Drat! And my night was going so well!

I'd heard about a guest lecture scheduled for tonight, given by an archaeologist who had been studying Mayan ruins for nine years, and thought, "Sounds intriguing; I'd like to go hear it." There were no objections to my going, we had supper early, I was listening to a wonderfully funny CD in the car on the way down to school, got through parking without having to pay, got my English toffee without any problems - so far really good. But what do I find when I get to the room where it's scheduled? The lecture was cancelled, with no reasons given and no advance notice. What's up with that? (seems almost like something from The Seven Crystal Balls/ Prisoners of the Sun - which I just read last week while I was babysitting, that's why it occurred to me) So much for that; I guess I'll just go home now.

2006-10-23T13:51:00.000-04:00

"I got an army, then I gave them spears, then I seized the power and I went around for a hundred years."

I'm listening to Burton Cummings .... I love it. One of my favourite of all my CDs. I was listening to it on Saturday night, too, thoroughly enjoying myself.

Speaking of Saturday night..... I apologize to those who were counting on me to go to LW. I realize I said I'd go, but someone called last-minute (Friday afternoon), needing a babysitter. I really couldn't turn it down - my dad volunteered babysitting services "any time", and those kids are adorable! By then it was too late to let "the network" know that I wouldn't be able to be in two places at once. But maybe it was better for me: I did some actual studying after they were asleep, which wouldn't have happened otherwise, I think. Aristophanes - bleagh. Oh well, that's over now.

I now have a new project to work on; I finally finished my sweater last Friday. I won't tell you yet what the new idea is - I'll save that for when it's done and I can maybe get some pictures of it.

~ ooh, a secret! ~

That's all for now; I'm going to get another cappuchino.

2006-10-18T15:56:00.000-04:00

I am woman, hear me roar
In numbers too big to ignore
And I know too much to go back an' pretend
'cause I've heard it all before
And I've been down there on the floor
No one's ever gonna keep me down again

CHORUS
Oh yes I am wise
But it's wisdom born of pain
Yes, I've paid the price
But look how much I gained
If I have to, I can do anything
I am strong (strong)
I am invincible (invincible)
I am woman

You can bend but never break me
'cause it only serves to make me
More determined to achieve my final goal
And I come back even stronger
Not a novice any longer
'cause you've deepened the conviction in my soul
......

Celebrating the launch of G.A.L.!

2006-10-18T14:38:00.000-04:00

Today is a day of great accomplishments: I got my links working! A little experimentation, a little hard work, a lot of success.

2006-10-12T14:06:00.000-04:00

"Window walkin' downtown, feelin' mighty good..."

This year I've discovered a real joy in going to university where I do. Mac is perfectly situated - it's only 5 minutes (driving) to Dundas or Westdale, both of which have wonderful used-book stores, and in 10 minutes I can be in Ancaster, which I'm still exploring.

Yesterday afternoon I had a few hours to spare before picking Ben up from Streetlight. So I grabbed the yellow pages and looked up bookstores. I found quite a list, picked up the car (I'm very strong! :D ), and went through my list, starting in Westdale. Success on the very first hit! The Westdale Bookworm is a small shop on a quiet part of King Street, and is absolutely stuffed with books! I've been looking for a nice hardcover copy of Jane Eyre, and I found two there! So I bought one of them (tough decision- which one to take?). Is there any better sensation in the world than walking out of an old bookstore into a blustery fall day with the very book you've been looking for, bought at a very reasonable price? I doubt it.

I still have about half the list left to cover - I'm saving that for the next book.

2006-10-11T14:12:00.000-04:00

Conquistador your stallion stands
In need of company
And like some angels haloed brow
You reek of purity
I see your armour-plated breast
Has long since lost its sheen
And in your death mask face
There are no signs which can be seen

And though I hoped for something to find
I could see no maze to unwind

Conquistador a vulture sits
Upon your silver shield
And in your rusty scabbard now
The sand has taken seed
And though your jewel-encrusted blade
Has not been plundered still
The sea has washed across your face
And taken of its fill

And though I hoped for something to find
I could see no maze to unwind

Conquistador there is no time
I must pay my respect
And though I came to jeer at you
I leave now with regret
And as the gloom begins to fall
I see there is no, only all
And though you came with sword held high
You did not conquer, only die

And though I hoped for something to find
I could see no maze to unwind
(repeat& fade)
~ Procol Harem

This is my favourite song by Procol Harem; the mental image is pretty strong. It always makes me think of P.S. Shelley's poem Ozymandias: the would-be conqueror is defeated, and time has begun to erase the last evidence of his existence. Someone has come to see the conqueror, and his perspective of the great man is changed after seeing what he has become. The last verse, especially - there is no time... I leave now with regret... though you came with sword held high/ You did not conquer, only die - that's always been my favourite part because of the sense of powerlessness in both the conquistador and his viewer; the viewer came with the intention of jeering - making himself feel greater than this defeated warrior - but finds he cannot. It just makes me ..... wow. It's a great song.

2006-10-10T18:47:00.000-04:00

"At the end of the day, you've just got to say, it's all right."

Wow, I'm tired! I've barely sat down and really relaxed for about five days now, and, oh, I can feel it! Here's the last five days, "in a nutshell", as our guide at the CWHM grade 10 field trip would say:

Friday was school and then dress shopping - Jo chose her dress, and Karen, Sharlene and I have almost decided on the style we want; it just requires a lot of shopping around, trying on one dress after another, ad infinitum.
Friday night and Saturday were study weekend, broken up by working Saturday morning.
Despite getting a nasty sinus cold with accompanying headache, Sunday I went to Em's in the early afternoon for her birthday. It's a good thing I left early: what with picking up a friend and taking the more scenic route, we made it to church with just 10 minutes to spare. After church we went back to Buikema's, where we were entertained by their spring-loaded Jack Russell, and Mr. Buikema and Harold's discussion on the "right" way to photograph smoke. Around dusk we went to Beamer Conservation area for a short walk; we stopped at a few lookouts in the cliffs, and watched the harvest moon rise over the lake and the town of Grimsby. By then it was quite dark, so we again went back to Em's and played Machiavelli, which is a great card game in which (we decided) cheating is entirely justifiable! After everyone else left, Emily and I stayed up and talked until 2. Crazy, I know. That leads us to Monday
Monday we slept in a bit, finally to be awakened by the dog. Grr. Mrs. Buikema came in a little while later and told us about the Vineland crafts fair. So we decided to go check it out. There were so many vendors, and I got some great craft ideas. Em and I both wanted to buy a panflute CD, but didn't have enough cash. After the fair I went home, had a nap, then Thanksgiving supper - the turkey was one of the best we've ever had. Jo and I stayed up late watching a movie, finally turning in around 12:30. Zzzzzz
Then today (Tuesday) Jo and I went to Ottawa St. to browse through all the fabric stores there, and we both came away happy and loaded down with the goods. Now I have to work on refining my design, to maximize the efficient use of my materials. I freely admit that I'm the guilty owner of many UFO's (unfinished objects), but I just get so caught up with a new idea halfway through the execution of another one! Too creative, I guess, if that's a fault.

And now I'm going to finish off this day with an English toffee cappuchino and the Roman military. Mmmmm.... (that's for the English toffee. But if they had real pictures (photographs) of Roman soldiers.....)

2006-09-26T20:05:00.000-04:00

"The leaves of life are falling down around you girl......."

Looks like life is picking up again; when the leaves come down, something's gotta go up, right? I'm slowly doing more, still being careful not to overdo like I did in August (that was a huge mistake: set me back more than a month!). It's worth the effort to be early for school so I don't have to run for the bus like I did the first Thursday, and since I drive myself, I can leave as early as I want. Good ol' Frank is back on his four wheels again after a blowout on the highway and a half-week in the driveway, and I've just about put the Advil away for good, so it's just a matter of time before all is back to normal again. We'll see.

Wedding planning is one of the main topics of conversation between Jo and I (along with brainstorming our respective latest creative projects). I've discovered already, after only one trip so far, that wedding dress shopping is exhausting, both for the bride-2-b and for the one who goes along! It was fun, though estimating dress sizes nearly requires a degree! Jo and I had a great time with the size-16 bridesmaid top, now remembered as the life jacket incident. I was laughing so hard I couldn't stand up *laughs*. Jo tried on the most amazing dress ~ she says it was "the "wow!" dress" ~ actually, she looked great in all the dresses she tried on. Not like me - but that was because they were all waaaay to big! I wonder where we're going next?

~
Well, it's good to be back at school! My schedule is the best so far, and I enjoy all but one class; E. and I are both wondering why we signed up for that one ( = for the credit). The rest are fantastic and interesting, for the most part. Night class kills me, though. Three hours of reading and analyzing essays? Oh well, at least we get a break halfway through. I've discovered a fascination for linguistics, and the Roman military. I love the mechanics of languages and military strategy. Ancient art can be like that, too: the architecture, or the proportions of imperial sculpture. Last week, Rev. Mulder gave me a wonderful book titled "Ancient Culture in Pictures"; actually, that's a translation, since the book is in Dutch. It makes for a great review, matching the Dutch names with the English ones I learned in the last few years. I'm also looking forward to next semester, when I have a course on ancient sanctuaries. This is great!

~
I've just begun reading The Hills is Lonely, about a woman who goes on a doctor-commanded vacation to the Hebrides. I'm not very far into it yet, so I can't say how I like it, but even wondering what it's about makes me wish my doctor had ordered a vacation! I've been wanting to get out and go somewhere different ever since I heard S. and M. talking about traveling all over the world while I worked with them this summer. Added to that, lately I've just wanted to get out and go somewhere, some place even just a few hours away, just to get in the car and drive off. I don't even know where I want to go, just that I want to. My art history professor keeps telling us that we have to go to Rome sometime; okay, that's more than a few hours' drive, but it's still very high on my list. There's also been talk of going to Holland, and Florida, and Paris....... *sigh* Someday. For now there's the Internet, and dreams.

Octopus's Garden

I'd like to be under the sea
In an octopus's garden in the shade
He'd let us in, knows where we've been
In his octopus's garden in the shade
I'd ask my friends to come and see
An octopus's garden with me
I'd like to be under the sea
In an octopus's garden in the shade

We would be warm below the storm
In our little hideaway beneath the waves
Resting our head on the sea bed
In an octopus's garden near a cave
We would sing and dance around
Because we know we can't be found
I'd like to be under the sea
In an octopus's garden in the shade

We would shout and swim about
The coral that lies beneath the waves
(Lies beneath the ocean waves)
Oh what joy for every girl and boy
Knowing they're happy and they're safe
(Happy and they're safe)
We would be so happy you and me
No one there to tell us what to do

I'd like to be under the sea
In an octopus's garden with you
In an octopus's garden with you
In an octopus's garden with you

~ Ringo Starr

Whoo! Long post!

2006-08-28T15:16:00.000-04:00

Start with a goodbye....

Oma passed away last Friday. She'd been sick for a while, and I guess I've been preparing myself since April, but it's still a shock. She had a really low blood count last Tuesday, and was in critical care; from there she slipped into a coma, and never woke up again. Mom left for Holland on Saturday, to be with her family. We'll miss her, but she's much better off now. I suppose it's a bit easier for us, since we rarely saw her, but at times like these I'm sure Mom and Dad feel the distance from the family a lot sharper.